One of the first books I read on hypnosis and sexuality was The Professional hypnotism manual: Introducing physical and emotional suggestibility and sexuality by John Kappas. Kappas argued that sexual orientation could be best described as a spectrum. If you put 100% heterosexuality at one end of the spectrum, and 100% homosexuality at the other end, most people will actually [biologically] fall somewhere in between.
Kappas argued everyone’s orientation is unique. It’s quite normal for some people to be 75% heterosexual and 25% homosexual, while others are 50% heterosexual and 50% homosexual. And that it was perfectly normal for orientation to change over time. A recent study confirmed this, showing that sexuality can more fluid than previously thought. Both gender identity and sexual orientation can change as we mature. This study also suggested that we may need more than three classifications for sexual orientation.
Cultural, social, and family pressures force people into believing that they need to choose being either hetero or homosexual. But when your body tells one thing and the so called ‘experts’ tell you something different, the conflict can cause confusion, anxiety, and sexual inhibitions.
The best way to deal with these issues (as difficult as it may be) is to focus on self discovery and self awareness. Your body is unique, and no one can determine your sexual orientation but you. Also, your sexuality isn’t ‘set in stone’. Your body is continuously changing. And you need to be mentally open to these changes.
Scientists in the 19th century defined terms like ‘heterosexual’ and ‘homosexual’ to define the field of human sexuality. A subject that hadn’t been scientifically studied before. ‘Bisexual’ was added later, first by people who realized they didn’t cleanly fit in either of the first two categories, then by scientists. Now we’re beginning to realize human sexuality is even more complex than previously thought, and three categories don’t even begin to describe the range of existing orientations.
It’s entirely possible that no existing label is adequate for your situation.
Some of the bi-curious women I’ve talked with have told me they understood all of this, but still found it very difficult to resolve this issue in their own minds. So for them, and women like you, I developed Reorienting. In this MP3, I give the listener the experience of meeting and engaging with women who find your curiosity – and, in fact, all orientations – both natural and acceptable. Once you accept their acceptance, you see yourself as part of this group, and you’re able to share their experiences. This helps you get in touch with your feelings for other women, accept these feelings as normal, and be open to an new experiences.